What To Do After You Lose a Child
Losing a child is a heartbreak no parent should ever have to face. Whether it’s sudden or after a long battle with illness like childhood cancer, the loss feels earth-shattering. In the days that follow, the world may feel heavy, loud, and unbearably quiet all at once.
At For Keeps, we often meet families during these moments—parents searching for ways to hold on to something tangible when everything else feels like it’s slipping away. We want you to know this: you are not alone.
This blog is written with compassion and care to help guide you through some of the practical and emotional steps you might take after losing a child.
1. Reach Out for Support – You Are Not Alone
There is no roadmap for this kind of grief, but there are people and organisations who walk this path beside you:
💛 For families facing childhood cancer loss:
- Win the Day is an organisation that offers emotional and financial support for families navigating childhood cancer. They also fund research in honour of children who bravely fought and continue to inspire.
- Redkite provides counselling, practical help, and bereavement support to families who have lost a child to cancer.
- The Kids’ Cancer Project and your hospital’s oncology social workers may also help connect you with resources, financial assistance, and memory-making programs.
💗 For families facing infant loss, miscarriage, or stillbirth:
- Red Nose Grief & Loss offers 24/7 counselling, peer support, and guidance after the death of a baby or child.
- Bears of Hope provides care packages, memory boxes, and ongoing support for parents after pregnancy and infant loss.
Ask your hospital or palliative care team if they’ve made referrals on your behalf—they often have access to funeral support grants, grief counselling services, and remembrance programs.
2. Consider the Keepsakes You Might Want Later
In the days following your loss, time seems to bend—there’s too much to do, and yet time stands still. It’s hard to think ahead when you’re deep in grief, but you might one day want to hold something in your hands that reminds you of them.
Some important keepsakes to consider include:
- Fingerprint impressions (in clay, ink, or engraved into jewellery)
- Hand and foot moulds
- Locks of hair
- Favourite clothing, toys, or hospital ID bands
- Funeral flowers or flowers from the final hospital stay
- Letters, drawings, or photos
- Heartbeat recordings or soundwaves
At For Keeps, we specialise in preserving these deeply personal items in ways that honour your child’s memory—framed displays, shadow boxes, Perspex cubes, and more. You don’t need to decide right away. We’re here whenever you’re ready.
3. Financial Help for Funeral Costs
If you are facing financial pressure alongside your grief, know that help is available:
- Win the Day and Redkite may offer funding or support navigating funeral expenses after childhood cancer loss.
- Red Nose offers funeral support services and can guide you through what government or charity-funded assistance may be available.
- Your hospital’s palliative or bereavement team can often assist with emergency relief funds, transport reimbursements, or in-kind services.
4. Speak to a Grief Counsellor
Grieving the loss of a child is unlike any other grief. It’s deep, raw, and ongoing. You might feel like you’re going in circles—or that you’re barely breathing. Please know that these feelings are valid and that professional support is not just helpful—it’s healing.
- Redkite, Red Nose, and Bears of Hope all offer free grief counselling tailored to child and infant loss.
- Griefline and Beyond Blue provide general support, including online forums and phone lines.
- Ask your GP about a mental health care plan—this can help you access ongoing, subsidised counselling.
Support is available for surviving siblings too. Many services offer age-appropriate grief resources and counselling for children.
5. Take It One Hour, One Day at a Time
There is no “right” way to grieve. Some days will feel unbearable. Some will carry a glimmer of light. Let yourself feel. Let yourself rest. Let others help when they offer.
Your love for your child will never disappear—it simply takes on a new form. And in the quiet spaces between the tears, their story continues. Through you.
From One Grieving Family to Another
We write this not as a business, but as people who have stood where you now stand. At For Keeps, many of us are parents. Some of us have buried our children. We know this pain intimately.
If you’re not ready to talk, that’s okay. But when you are—whether it’s next week or next year—we’ll be here with open hearts and gentle hands, ready to preserve your memories with love and respect.
Sending strength and love,
Jessica & the For Keeps Team
